©2002 HH Friedman
The Simple Life:
The Case Against Ostentation in Jewish Law*
by
Hershey H. Friedman, Ph.D.
Professor of Business and
Marketing
Department of Economics
Brooklyn College of the City
University of New York
E-mail: x.friedman@att.net
The author wishes to thank
Menachem Klein, for his insights and assistance.
Abstract
While Judaism sees nothing wrong with wealth, it
does frown on ostentation. Flaunting wealth has the following deleterious
effects: (1) It makes one conspicuous
and arouses the envy of others, including enemies of the Jewish people, (2)
ostentation can cause people who are not very wealthy to become ashamed of
their lack of means, and (3) it can make one arrogant. The purpose of wealth is to help others, not
to show it off.
Introduction
We live in a very affluent society. Unfortunately, the gap between the wealthy
and the poor is still quite wide, and is widening further. Nueno (1998) notes that there are now more than
2,000,000 millionaires in the United States.
In addition, the worldwide demand for luxury brands since 1995 has been
growing at the rate of 10% per year; 30% in some countries. The “suppression of
ostentation” which appeared in the early 1990’s during a mini-recession in the
United States has all but disappeared.
This paper will address the attitude of Jewish law
towards ostentation. Is one permitted
to live an extravagant, opulent, and excessive lifestyle? This paper will demonstrate that a showy,
overly materialistic lifestyle is not considered an appropriate lifestyle by
Jewish authorities. While it is true
that Judaism has a very positive attitude towards wealth and does not generally
admire an ascetic way of life, neither does it condone an ostentatious
lifestyle.
The
Jewish Attitude Towards Wealth
The Jewish attitude towards wealth is quite
positive. In fact, wealth, peace,
and/or long life are rewards from God for obeying God’s laws (Leviticus 26:
3-13; Deuteronomy 11: 13-16; Deuteronomy 25:15; Proverbs 22:4). Those that use their wealth to help the poor
will be blessed by God (Deuteronomy 15:10; Isaiah 1:17-19; Proverbs
19:17). The verse states (Deuteronomy
16: 11): “And you shall rejoice before
the Lord your God – you, your son, your daughter, your manservant, your
maidservant, the Levite that is within your gates, the stranger, the orphan,
and the widow.” The Midrash (Tanchuma,
Deuteronomy 16: 11) notes that God asserts that four of the above (“your son,
your daughter, your manservant, and your maidservant”) are part of your
household and four belong to Mine; take care of Mine and make them happy by
providing for them, and I will take care of yours.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Taanis 9a) also sees
wealth as a reward from God. In a
wordplay on the verse (Deuteronomy 14: 22):
“You shall surely tithe,” the Talmud advises that one should tithe in
order to become rich (the Hebrew word that
means to tithe is very similar to the word that means to become rich). The verse (Proverbs 11:24), “There is one
who scatters and yet is given more” is interpreted by many of the commentators
(e.g., Rashi and Ibn Ezra) as
referring to one who spends his money on the needy. The question of what a
person should do to become rich is discussed in the Talmud; one answer is to
engage in much business and deal honestly (Babylonian Talmud, Niddah 70b).
Wealth is seen as “comely to the righteous and comely to the world” (Babylonian
Talmud, Avot 6:8), and affluent people who used their possessions to help others
were respected by the Talmudic sages (Babylonian Talmud, Eruvin 86a).
In his classic thirteenth-century ethics (mussar) book, Ma’alos Hamiddos, Rabbi
Yechiel b. Yekusiel describes 24 important virtues. He lists honestly-obtained wealth as a virtue (Virtue 19) since
it enables one to help the needy. He
notes that Abraham was wealthy and used his riches to help others.
It is clear that Judaism
sees nothing wrong with wealth as long as it is obtained honestly and used to
help the poor. Asceticism, on the other
hand, was opposed by many of the Jewish sages opposed. Indeed, Rabbi Elazar Hakappar in explaining
the verse (Numbers 6: 11): “ And make
atonement for him, for that he sinned regarding the person,” states that the
sin of the Nazirite was in abstaining from the pleasure of drinking wine. He adds:
“If one who afflicted himself only with respect to wine is called a
sinner, how much more so is one who ascetically refrains from everything
considered a sinner. Therefore one who
fasts [excessively] is called a sinner” (Babylonian Talmud, Nedarim 10a). Shmuel also agreed that ascetism is not to
be admired and stated that even if one fulfills a vow of abstinence, he is
called a sinner (Babylonian Talmud, Nedarim 22a), and that whoever fasts
[excessively] is called a sinner (Babylonian Talmud, Taanis 11a). The Jerusalem
Talmud (Nedarim 9:1) states: “It is not
sufficient what the Torah has forbidden you, so you seek to prohibit upon
yourself other things?”
Even though Rabbi Elazar
disagreed with Shmuel and said that one who fasts is holy, the prevalent view in Judaism seems to be that
ascetism is not admirable. Maimonides
(Hilchos De’ot 3:1) concludes: “A
person should not prohibit upon himself through vows and oaths the use of
permitted things … Our Rabbis forbade that one afflict himself by fasting. Concerning this and similar matters, Solomon
commanded us (Ecclesiastes 7:16): ‘Be not overly righteous, nor excessively
wise. Why should you be so
desolate?’”
Rabbi
Bachya, in his
classical work on ethics, Chovos Halevavos [Duties of the Heart],
devotes an entire chapter to “The Gate of Abstinence.” He makes the point that
a lifestyle focused on materialism, luxuries, and overindulgence will turn a
person away from God. The Torah attempts
to teach the individual the importance of intellect ruling over desires; and
not to make the pursuit of pleasure one’s “Torah” and religion.
Tamari (2000, pp. 231-235)
summarizes the many different opinions on asceticism and concludes that the sin
of the ascetic is in rejecting the gifts of the Creator. Everything in this world has been created
for the benefit of mankind and is good.
Judaism requires that there be a balance between the physical-material
side of the person and the spiritual side, and does not condone the total
rejection of all pleasure.
Given that there is nothing wrong with wealth per se
or with enjoying the permitted pleasures of this world, this paper will
highlight three serious negative effects of flaunting wealth: (1) It makes one conspicuous and arouses the
envy of others, including enemies of the Jewish people, (2) it can cause people
who are not very wealthy to become ashamed of their lack of means, and (3) it
can make one arrogant.
Arousing
the Envy of Others
During the seven-year famine that afflicted
the world, Jacob told his sons (Genesis 42:1):
“Why do you make yourselves so conspicuous?” The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Taanis 10b) interprets this verse
as follows: “Jacob said to his sons,
‘Do not show yourselves to be sated either before Esau or Ishmael in order that
you do not arouse their envy against you.’”
This would seem to suggest that the Jewish people have to be careful
about arousing the jealousy of the gentile nations that surround them. However, the Talmud uses this verse to
derive the law that if a Jew travels from a town where the populace is not
fasting to a town where the inhabitants are fasting, he should fast with
them. Even if he inadvertently eats (or
is a sick person who is permitted to eat), he should still not eat in
public. This implies that the
prohibition against “making oneself conspicuous” applies to arousing the envy
of Jews as well as gentiles.
The Torah
Temimah, commenting on the above-mentioned verse (Genesis 42:1), connects
the idea of not making oneself conspicuous with the Talmudic (Babylonian
Talmud, Sanhedrin 29b) assertion that “a person is accustomed not to make
himself appear sated with wealth,” and states that this Talmudic principle is
derived from the above-mentioned admonition of Jacob to his children. The
Talmudic principle is used to explain why when a person claims to owe money to
others, we do not necessarily use this as an admission of indebtedness, and
thus the “creditors” may not collect without additional proof. The Talmud believes that it is quite
possible that the wealthy person pretended to owe money to several individuals
either in order not to arouse the envy of others – people do not want to make
others envious of their riches– and/or because of ayin harah, the evil eye.
This idea of not showing off wealth is also discussed by Rabbi Ephraim
Lunshitz (c. 1550 – 1619), author of the Kli
Yakar, a popular commentary on the Torah, in his homiletic interpretation of the verse (Deuteronomy 2:3): “Enough of your circling this mountain; turn
yourselves northward.” The Hebrew for
“northward” is tzafonah, a word that also means “hidden.” The Kli
Yakar’s homiletic explanation of this verse is that the Torah is telling
the Jewish people to maintain a low profile when wandering around in exile and
not flaunt wealth in order not to arouse the envy of the gentiles. He then criticizes those Jews in his
generation who live beyond their means, wear fancy clothing, and live in
extravagant homes and thereby incite their gentile neighbors against them. In the Kli
Yakar’s words, an individual with assets of a hundred lives as though he
has thousands. The Kli Yakar then blames the troubles that befall the Jews on
ostentatious lifestyles. Rabbi Lunshitz, headed a yeshiva in Lemberg, Poland
and later on became a rabbi in Prague.
His words were prescient and the horrific massacres of Polish Jews
beginning in 1648 during an uprising led by Bogdan Chmelnitzki were a major
tragedy for the Jewish people. Somewhere between 100,000 and 300,000 Jews were
brutally murdered.
The enigmatic statement quoted in the Talmud
(Babylonian Talmud, Chagiga 9b), "Poverty is so fitting for the Jew, like
a red strap (or saddle) on a white horse," is interpreted by Rabbi Elijah,
Gaon of Vilna, in the following manner.
A horse is saddled up when it goes out; in the stable everything is
removed. So too, the Jewish people
should wear their poverty when they go out in order not to arouse the envy of
the gentiles. Within the privacy of
one’s house, however, wealth is good (Kreuser, 2000: p. 171).
Rabbi Menken (1995) asks why the Torah
describes in so much detail the offerings brought by the heads of each tribe to
commemorate the dedication of the Altar.
After all, the offerings brought by the twelve tribal leaders were all
identical and the Torah could have simply mentioned it one time. He cites the
answer of Rabbi Shmuel Greinemann of
Bnei Braq. The decision to bring exactly the same offering on the second day as
on the first day was purposely made by the tribal leader (Nethanel ben Tzuar)
who did not want to outdo the tribal leader who brought his offering on the
first day (Nachhon ben Aminadav).
Nethanel did not want to show off and thereby cause envy. The Lord was so pleased with this that he
allowed one of the sacrifices to be brought even on the Sabbath (they were
brought for twelve straight days) and recorded every leader’s sacrifice in full
detail. This is a message for future
generations not to seek to outdo others and thereby arouse envy.
It is quite possible that all the “humor” about the
Jewish American Princess (so called JAP jokes) is a modern-day manifestation of
envy generated by conspicuous display of wealth. In civilized societies, Jewish neighbors who may appear wealthier
than the rest of society are not physically assaulted, they are verbally
attacked with nasty stereotypical humor.
Is There
Anything Wrong with Being Envious of Others?
Arousing the envy of gentiles in non-democratic
countries where Jews had few civil rights was certainly not wise. What, however, is wrong with making fellow
Jews envious? In fact, marketers often use envy as a tool to promote status
products. Much of the pleasure in
owning a very expensive car (e.g., Rolls Royce), watch (Rolex), or pen (Mont
Blanc), derives from showing it off.
One commercial said it very succinctly: “If you’ve got it, flaunt it.”
The tenth commandment in Exodus (20:14) states: “You shall not covet your fellow’s
house. You shall not covet your
fellow’s wife, his manservant, his maidservant, his ox, his donkey, nor
anything else hat belongs to your fellow.”
In Deuteronomy (5:18), the wording is slightly different: “And you shall not covet your fellow’s wife,
you shall not desire your fellow’s
house, his field, his manservant, his maidservant, his ox, his donkey, nor
anything else that belongs to your fellow.”
In Deuteronomy, the wording is changed from covet (tachmod) to desire (titaveh). One violates the
prohibition of not coveting only if there is an action, even if one pays for
the object. The violation against
desiring another’s property is even in the heart. Maimonides (Hilchos Gezelah 1:9-12) makes this distinction
between tachmod and titaveh. Thus, Maimonides concludes that “desire leads to coveting and
coveting leads to robbery.” Also, one
who simply desires another’s property has violated one prohibition, whereas one
who purchases the desired object by coaxing the owner to sell it to him is
guilty of two prohibitions. One who steals the object is guilty of a third
prohibition against stealing.
It is not clear whether or not individuals who
purposely display their wealth to arouse the envy of their fellows are guilty
of “lifnei iver,” i.e., “placing a stumbling block before the
blind” (Leviticus 19:14). This is a
prohibition that includes helping or causing another to sin (Babylonian Talmud,
Pesachim 22b). One might argue that
being ostentatious may produce desire on the part of others for a particular
product, but not necessarily desire for my
product and is thus not a violation of lo
titaveh.
It should be noted, however, that in the classic
medieval ethics (mussar) work, Orchos Tzadikim (Chapter 14: Jealousy),
the author notes that jealousy, a trait which no person can totally escape
from, comes from observing what friends own.
We become envious of a friend’s garment, food, house, and/or wealth and
envy leads to coveting. Once a person
is overpowered by coveting, he becomes capable of violating each of the Ten
Commandments. This is the reason the sages of the past prayed: “let no person’s jealousy rise up against me
nor my jealousy upon others.” Causing others to be envious of oneself is a
violation of the Biblical injunction against “placing a stumbling block before
the blind person.” The Orchos Tzadikim advises men, women, and
children not to wear very beautiful and expensive clothing and thereby arouse the envy of others. He also advises moderation with regard to
food and other goods for the same reason.
Thus, flaunting wealth can cause one to be guilty of the sin of lifnei iver, according to the view of
the Orchos Tzadikim.
Out
of Deference to the Poor/Not to Shame Those of Limited Means
Sometimes, ostentation causes more than envy. Poor people will often, because of shame,
borrow money to keep up with their neighbors when making weddings or bar
mitzvahs. They borrow and then cannot
repay the loans. Some might even in
engage in dishonest practices in order to be able to afford the expense of
keeping up with their neighbors. Certainly, very little good can result from
making other people envious. The Talmud
describes several rules that were instituted out of deference to the poor,
i.e., so they should not feel ashamed of their poverty.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Moed Katan 27a-27b)
notes that the following changes were enacted in the funeral ceremony in order
not to embarrass the impecunious.
Our
Rabbis taught: Formerly, they would
bring food to the house of mourners in following manner: to the rich, in baskets of gold and silver
and to the poor in wicker baskets made of peeled willows. And the poor people
were ashamed. The sages therefore
instituted that all should be provided with food in wicker baskets made of
peeled willows out of deference of the poor.
Our Rabbis taught: Formerly, they would provide drinks to the
house of mourners in the following manner: to the rich, in white glass [which
was very expensive] and to the poor in colored glass. And the poor people were
ashamed. The sages therefore instituted
that all should be provided with drinks in colored glass out of deference to
the poor.
Formerly, they would uncover the face of the rich [corpse] and
cover the face of the poor because their face became blackened by famine. And
the poor people were ashamed. The sages
therefore instituted that all faces should be covered out of deference to the
poor.
Formerly, they would carry out the rich [corpse] in a state
bed and the poor on a common bier. And the poor people were ashamed. The sages therefore instituted that all
should be carried out on a common bier out of deference to the poor…
Formerly, the expense of carrying out the dead was harder on
the family than the death itself; the family therefore abandoned the corpse and
fled. Until Rabban Gamliel [President of the Sanhedrin] disregarded his own
dignity, and had his body carried out in flaxen shrouds. Afterwards, all the people followed his lead
and had themselves carried out in flaxen shrouds. Rabbi Papa stated: And
nowadays, all follow the practice of being carried out even in a canvas shroud
that costs but a zuz.
The Meiri (Babylonian Talmud, Moed Katan 27a), based
on the above passage, makes a general statement that people should always be
careful that poor people or others are not ashamed because of one’s
actions. Wealthy people should
therefore do the same as the poor in order not to embarrass those that do not
have the means.
The Mishna (Babylonian Talmud, Taanis 26b) describes the great days of joy on the
fifteenth of Av and Yom Kippur when the single girls of Jerusalem would dance
in the vineyards in front of the single men in order to attract a spouse. The Mishna notes that the girls went out in
“white garments which they borrowed in order not to shame those that did not
have the means,” and could not afford
nice clothing. The sages did not enact
this but the girls on their own recognized the importance of not shaming those
of limited financial means.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Pesachim 82a)
discusses why an individual was not permitted to burn a Paschal lamb that became
ritually unclean in front of the Temple with his own wood. Rabbi Yosef offers the following
reason: The sages did not want to
embarrass the poor people who did not have their own wood so they, therefore,
enacted that everyone had to use the altar wood that belonged to the Temple.
There is one situation in which the sages were not
concerned with the principle of “not shaming those that do not have the
means.” Although the required amount of
the Kethubah (the marriage
certificate which indicates how much the wife will get if she becomes widowed
or is divorced) is fixed – 200 zuz for a virgin and 100 zuz for a widow or
divorcee– the husband is allowed to add as much as he wants (i.e., Tosfos Kethubah). The Gemara asks: Is this not obvious? Of
course, an individual can add whatever he wishes. The Talmud answers that I might have thought that, in order not
to embarrass those that do not have the means, the sages fixed the amount of
the Kethubah and do not allow adding
to it. This is why the Mishna explicitly
states that one can add whatever amount he wishes. It seems clear that the sages did not want to use the principle
of “not shaming …” in a situation where another party –one who was usually poor
herself – would be hurt, i.e., the wife.
The principle, however, is still operant in other situations.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Bava Bathra 9b) feels
that one who gives charity in secret is “greater than Moses.” Charity, ideally, should be given in secret
so that the two parties, the giver and the receiver, do not know each other
(Babylonian Talmud, Chagigah 5a; Maimonides, Hilchos Matnos Aniyim 10: 7
-14). Maimonides lists eight levels of
charity: There is only one level above
completely anonymous charity – providing a poor person with employment. If Jewish law prefers that charity be
anonymous so as not to embarrass the indigent, it certainly would not approve
of ostentation — for the same reason.
Resulting
in Arrogance and Conceit
The conspicuous display of excessive wealth can lead one to
become arrogant. The Torah (Deuteronomy 8: 11-18) describes one of the dangers
of affluence. A successful individual
might believe that “my power and the might of my hand has made me all this
wealth.” The Torah states (Deuteronomy
32: 15) what can happen when the Jewish people overindulge in the pleasures of
this world: “Jeshurun [Israel] became
fat and kicked … And he forsook God who made him.” Rather, one should remember that God gives wealth to individuals
in order that they may do His will. The Torah (Deuteronomy 17:17) states that even a
king is not permitted to “greatly increase for himself silver and gold.”
The reason is given in the Torah (Deuteronomy 17:20): “So that his heart does not become lifted
above his brethren.” Ramban, on this
verse, makes the point that if haughtiness is to be shunned by a king all the
more so should it be shunned by ordinary people. The king, however, is
permitted to
increase his wealth to help others (Sefer
Hachinuch).
One king who was punished for flaunting his wealth
was King Hezekiah. He flaunted the
great wealth in his treasuries to Merodakh-Baladan, son of Baladan, the King of
Babylonia. Isaiah said to Hezekiah
(Isaiah 39:6): “Behold, a time is
coming when everything in your palace and what your forefathers have
accumulated to this day will be carried off to Babylonia; nothing shall remain,
says the Lord.” Hezekiah’s sin was in
taking too much pride in his worldly possessions and showing them off.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Maakos 24a) states
that the prophet Micah (6:8) reduced the Torah to three major principles: “What does the Lord require of you: only to do justice, to love acts of
kindness, and to walk discreetly before your God.” The Talmud says that ‘walking discreetly’ before God refers to
funerals and weddings; “If in matters that are generally not done in private
the Torah says that one should ‘walk discreetly,’ how much more so in matters
that usually call for modesty should certainly be done so.” There are many interpretations of this
Talmudic statement, the Etz Yosef interprets this as referring to moderation
when making funerals and weddings, i.e., one should live a life of moderation
and not be ostentatious, even when making funerals and weddings.
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Berachos 57b) asserts
that “three things broaden an individual’s mind: a beautiful house, a beautiful wife, and beautiful
clothing.” It is not clear whether the
term “broaden the mind” is positive or negative. The Maharsha, a major commentary interprets this passage to mean
that these three things can make one arrogant since it leads to a preoccupation
with the pleasures of this world.
Maimonides
(Hilchos De’ot 5: 9) describes the
garment of the scholar as not being “of gold or purple wool that everyone
stares at” or one that is so poor that it is an embarrassment to its
wearer. Rather, one should choose the
middle road when it comes to clothing and wear nice garments. Rabbi Solomon
Ganzfried, in his compilation of Jewish laws and customs, the Kitzur Shulcan
Aruch (3:3), also believes that the middle road is the ideal as far as
clothing. He states that one should not wear clothing that is very expensive
since it leads to arrogance; wearing clothing that is too cheap or soiled is
not right since it will cause one to be denigrated by others.
The Chofetz
Chaim (Kuntros Sefat Tamim 5) states:
Our sages, blessed are they,
have stated that: ‘Who is wise
man? One who sees the consequences of
his actions.’ Therefore, a person, even
if he is in a strong situation, must always understand that because of the
turbulence of our times, which is prevalent because of our many sins, one
should behave when it comes to personal expenditures in the middle way,
according to the individual and place. And even if God has been kind to him and
given him great wealth, he should not wear very expensive embroidered clothing
since that will damage his soul because it brings a person to arrogance and
also incites the Evil Inclination. In
addition, it causes others, who do not have the means to look at him and desire
to emulate him. In the end, they will borrow and not repay their loans
or rob and cheat. And because of these
extravagances, the expenses in our times for clothing for weddings have
increased so that many of our daughters are humiliated when it comes time for
them to get married. Fathers and
mothers cry and wail and no one can help them.
Sumptuary Laws
Tamari ( 1996, pp. 172-173) describes various
sumptuary laws — regulations limiting personal expenditures on religious grounds
— that were passed in Jewish communities
during the last several centuries.
The Jewish synod of the Rhineland enacted the following during the 13th
Century: “no child of the Covenant
shall dress after the fashion of the gentiles, nor wear sleeves [some kind of
fancy accouterment] nor shall have long hair.”
This was enacted in Italy during the 15th Century: “In order that we may carry ourselves in
modesty and humbleness before the Lord our God …no one may possess cloaks of
any other color than black, sleeves may not have silk linings … so too cloaks
of sable or ermine or expensively dyed material are forbidden.” In 1728, the community of Furth prohibited
serving coffee or tea as they were very expensive. In addition, a limit was placed on the number of musicians at
festivities and the festivities had to end at midnight. In the middle of the 17th
century, the Vaad Arba Aratzot, the
Council of Four Lands, used a different approach. They decreed that the more guests one invited to a festive
occasion, the more he had to pay to the community tax collector –two gold coins
for 15 guests, four coins for 20 guests, six coins for 25 guests, etc. This ensured that money spent on
extravagance would not mean less for the social needs of the community. Also, one poor person had to be invited for
every 10 guests.
Rabbi Nathaniel Helfgot, as part of a Torah Ethics
Project of the Orthodox Caucus, has prepared a Web page on materialism and
moderation (Helfgott, undated). He
cites several modern-day sources that have been concerned with
ostentation. Rabbi Yaacov Landau, chief
rabbi of Bnei Brak, in a letter dated Nissan 1996, complained of the showiness
of bar mitzvah celebrations that included musical instruments in a large
hall. He noted that “the earliest sages
already decried the wasteful spending for all types of celebrations.” He was concerned about the fact that these
extravagant affairs caused a great deal of envy and resulted in people
“assuming tremendous debts” to pay for these gaudy celebrations.
Helfgott presents the
following excerpts from a public declaration of the Rabbis of Bnei Brak, (reprinted
in The Jewish Observer June 1971):
To all our brethren, beloved
sons of Israel, who fear God and revere his name: From the time of our
inception as a nation we were distinguished as a people of spirit and nobility,
leading modest and wholesome lives... "Nothing is more beautiful than
modesty", our rabbis proclaimed, and a life of modesty was the crowning
pride of our people throughout the ages.
As of late, the stress on luxurious living is taking a toll an
ever-increasing toll on our resources of time and money, and as a result the
health and stability of entire families suffer... At an assembly of the rabbis
we have decided to enact the following ordinances and enforce them with all the
powers vested in us by our sacred Torah... (a) A kiddush in shul marking a
family celebration should be limited to whatever extent possible.
(b) Spending on gifts for a
bride and groom should be limited.
(c) Guests at a wedding
supper should be limited to family and an intimate circle of friends. (d) The
wedding supper should include only one main course, fish or meat, with
appropriate side dishes. (e) No flowers should be placed on the guests' tables.
Rabbi Eliezer Shach, Dean
of the Yeshivat Ponevez, wrote in Nissan 1966 about the “excessive wasteful spending,
in all types of celebrations, such as weddings and tenaim, and bar mitzvah celebrations.” He also expressed concern for the great “suffering” of parents
who had to borrow large sums of money for these affairs.
One Hassidic sect that has strict rules about the
amount that may be spent on weddings is Gur.
Because the price of apartments in Jerusalem is so high, they are told
to live in other communities. In fact,
they have a large community in Arad.
The Rabbi of Gur warned the streimel
(fur hats worn by Hassidim) manufacturers that if the price would be too high,
he would order his Hassidim to stop wearing the streimels.
At the 2001 Agudath Israel Annual Convention, a
brochure entitled “Guidelines for Financial Realism and Tzenius
[modesty] in our Chasunas [weddings]” was given to participants. It
called for such measures as eliminating the vort [engagement party],
limitations on the smorgasbord, elimination of the bar and Viennese table, a
ceiling of 400 invited guests, limits on the menu and dessert, and recommended
a one-piece band (maximum of four musicians).
The brochure notes that the reason for these restrictions is not only
for financial reasons, i.e., they place a great burden on individuals of
limited means, but primarily because “they simply detract from the ultimate
purpose of our existence.”
Histapkut Bamuat: Being Content With Less
If Judaism frowns on ostentation, what kind of
lifestyle does it recommend? Histapkut bamuat, being content with
less, is definitely considered a virtue in Jewish law. Ben Zoma’s statement (Babylonian Talmud,
Avot 4:1): “Who is wealthy? One who is
happy with his lot” succinctly states this philosophy. The following verse in Proverbs (21:17)
indicates that a life of luxury can lead to poverty: “One who loves wine and
oil shall not be wealthy.” Moreover,
the Mishna (Babylonian Talmud, Avot 5:19) states that “Whoever possesses the
following three traits is of the disciples of our forefather Abraham: … a good eye [generous], a humble spirit
[humility], and a modest soul.” “Modest
soul” is translated as one who controls his physical desires even for things
that are permitted (Shaarei Teshuva,
Shaar 1:34). Rabbi Yechiel b. Yekusiel
Anav (Ma’alos Hamiddos, Virtue 21)
lists being content with less as a virtue and advises people against
extravagance.
The Torah (Deuteronomy
12:20) uses the expression “When the Lord, your God, will broaden your boundary
as He promised you, and you say, ‘I will eat meat,’ because your soul has a
desire to eat meat…” The Talmud
(Babylonian Talmud, Chullin 84a) states that the Torah teaches us a rule of
conduct by introducing the section dealing with permission to eat unconsecrated
eat with the phrase “broaden your boundary.”
One should not indulge in luxuries such as meat unless he can afford
it. The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Chullin 84a) derives a
similar principle from the following verse in Proverbs (27:26): “And life for your maidens.” According to the Talmud, this verse teaches
us the following: “A parent should not
accustom his children to eat meat and wine.”
The Talmud (Babylonian Talmud, Chullin 84b) also adds: “A person should always eat and drink less
than his means allow, clothe and cover himself according to his means, and
honor his wife and children [with nice clothing—Maharsha] with more than his
means allow.” The Talmud allowed one to spend relatively more on clothing than
food because it felt that clothing was important since proper attire provides
an individual with dignity (Rashi).
Note that the Talmud was not advising an individual to provide lavish,
expensive clothing for his family.
A similar idea can be seen
from the verse (Exodus 16:8): “When the
Lord shall give you in the evening meat to eat, and in the morning bread to
fill you up.” The Israelites were
promised bread (manna), not meat, to fill you up. Rashi notes that the Torah teaches one to sate himself with
simple foods such as bread and eat luxuries such as meat only
occasionally.
Apparently, the Torah does not want people to
squander their wealth — if they are not
well off — even on simple luxuries such as meat and wine. People have to live a life of moderation and
frugality and thereby be content. Being ostentatious and indulging in a lavish
lifestyle, especially if one cannot afford it, can only lead to dishonesty and
pilfering.
Conclusion
Greenwald (1996, p. 87) notes that Judaism teaches one to be satisfied with his lot and devote time for spiritual purposes. Even wealthy people should not live in luxury, wasting their wealth on unnecessary things. Rather, wealth should be used for charity, for performing deeds of loving kindness, and for studying Torah.
One
of the Talmudic sages noted that former generations were at a much higher
spiritual level than his own generation and they were thus worthy of having
miracles performed for them (Babylonian Talmud, Berachos 20a).
In fact, when there was a drought, this sage noted, one pious man of an
earlier generation would simply remove his shoe (as a sign of affliction) and it
would immediately start raining; whereas, the sages of his own generation could
torment themselves and cry all day and get no rain. The Talmud asserts that the
sages of the previous generations were willing to make great sacrifices for the
sanctification of God’s name.
For instance, Rabbi Addah bar Ahavah once saw a woman that he thought was
Jewish wearing a karbalta (a very ostentatious red garment) in the street
and tore it off her. It turned out the woman was not Jewish and the authorities
fined him.
This story indicates how wrong it is for Jews to wear ostentatious
garments.
It is so improper that the Talmud states that Rabbi Addah was sanctifying
the name of the Lord by his action.
The sages recognized that very little good can
result from a splashy, gaudy lifestyle.
On the contrary, it produces envy, suffering, arrogance, dishonesty, and
shaming of the impecunious. The Torah
teaches us that ostentation is not the true purpose of wealth, helping others
is.
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